Voluntary Hardship
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Nolan LaVoie knows a thing or two about working hard in life.
Why does Nolan LaVoie drive an old truck with a manual transmission, willingly live in a van with his family, participate in grueling ultra-endurance mountain bike events? Find out why he believes voluntary hardships are a key to living a full life in this speech delivered to the Miller School in the spring of 2023. Nolan LaVoie is MSA’s Director of Student Experience and a good example of MSA’s mission in action.
The desire to be comfortable is ever-present. We are marketed to by clothing, car, alcohol, energy drink, technology, food companies, ad nausea...In fact, it is estimated that we see over 4,000 - 10,000 ads per day… These ads try and convince us that we deserve comfort and luxury. That somehow we are deficient in our current state of being, and that life is hard. We are told that we are owed a break. In fact, we are entitled to it, and if we purchase their product, it will somehow make us whole. It will somehow make us happy.
I would argue it is becoming increasingly difficult to be challenged in a truly authentic and meaningful way. In fact, we literally have the power of Gods… We can create light, heat, and cold. We can have our computers write our papers, solve our math problems, and pay our bills. Our cars can nearly drive themselves, and we can dine on the most exotic and exquisite cuisine within hours of our desire to indulge.
I would challenge you to find one aspect of human life that we cannot find modern technology to do more efficiently and effectively. We are, in my humble opinion, creeping dangerously close to being both omnipotent and omniscient, and I fear that, like Icarus, we are going to fly too close to the sun if we don't intentionally choose a different path…
In 1991 and again in 1994, a group of scientists went to live in what was called The Biosphere in the desert of Arizona. The Biosphere was a project launched by a billionaire who wanted to build a self-sufficient ecosystem (similar to what might exist on the moon or Mars) that humans could live within. The biosphere was built on over 3 acres of land and is the largest closed ecological system ever created. Within the Biosphere exists a 1900 sq meter rainforest. In the rainforest, the pioneer species grew rapidly; however, the Trees there suffered from what is called etiolation and weakness. I'll say that again. The trees became weak and brittle because of a lack of stress on the wood that is normally created in response to winds in natural conditions.
You see, the lack of stress and the lack of challenge caused the trees to weaken, crack and break.
This is what I believe is happening to us. To humans. I believe that we were meant to live challenging lives and that it is the stressful and hard parts in life that make life worth living and although it may not feel like it at the moment. In hindsight, it makes the highs that much sweeter.
I'll give you an example; a few days ago, Ms. Herlevson shared an article with me from an interview with a player for the Milwaukee Bucks named Giannis Antekoumpo; after a difficult defeat to the Miami Heat to knock them out of the playoffs, a reporter asked him if he considered the season a failure, given the loss…. I love his response.
He asked, “Do you get a promotion every year at your job? No, right? So every year, your work is a failure? No. Every year, you work towards something, which is a goal: It's to get a promotion, to be able to take care of your family, provide a house for them, or take care of your parents. It's not a failure; it's steps to success. There are always steps to it. Michael Jordan played for 15 years and won 6 championships. The other nine years were a failure? That's what you're telling me.
There's no failure in sports. There are good days and bad days; some days you are able to be successful, some days you're not, some days it's your turn, and some days it's not your turn. That's what sport's about. You don't always win; some other people are going to win. And this year, someone else is going to win. Simple as that.”
I think this is a potent message. One that I wish I had been told at your age. Life is an infinite game. There is no winning or losing. There are no timeouts. There are no shortcuts. Time keeps pushing on. There is no moment, no item or thing, no possession, no comfort that will make you eternally happy.
The only thing that can make you feel whole is you. And I believe that the only way you can experience the feeling of a life well lived is to regularly choose what I call voluntary hardship.
This winter Mr. Robbins and I would plunge ourselves into 40-degree water 3-5 times a week. Not because it was fun. Not because we had to but because it made us better able to endure the stresses of day-to-day life.
We wanted to be the trees that are able to endure the strongest of wind storms. We wanted to armor ourselves against future challenges. We wanted deep, durable roots.
I am sure this all sounds crazy, but to give you a bit more context, I still enjoy driving a 5-speed manual transmission over an automatic. I hate automatic sinks and self-opening doors. Not because they are not effective but because they make things too easy. They take away my independence. My autonomy. They take away what I believe makes us human—the ability to choose. I would encourage you to make a similar choice.. Choose to hold the door open for another person, lift up your head and say hi to someone as you walk down the hall, learn to change your own oil, take the stairs, handwrite a letter, sew up a hole in your trousers, write your own paper, read a book or have that difficult conversation… The small things add up, and the pride you will feel is immeasurable.
As the world around us gets easier and the sirens call us from the islands beckoning us towards fleeting pleasures and delights, I would challenge you to choose the hard right over the easy wrong. To develop the musculature now to lift yourself through the difficulty of your future life. In the end, it is the only thing that I believe will bring true wholeness to our lives.
Let me leave you with this. Be skeptical of anything that someone tells you will make life easier or more convenient. Anything that creates space between you and other people because it is the hard work of being human that leads to a full and satisfying life.
